Zumba

Let me start by saying: to all my Zumba family who reads this - I LOVE YOU ALL!  I feel incredibly lucky to have found a job that I love so much.  I definitely realize that not everyone can say that.  It is undeniable that my Zumba family has come through for me in my times of need, perhaps more than my "real" family, and I will always be grateful for that.

Okay now on to the rest of this.

I am wondering if maybe I need to find a new job.  The problem with that is, obviously, that I won't love any other job the way I love(d) Zumba.  I still do love it.  But I am not sure that I should be doing it for a my part of the income.

This morning I subbed for my friend.  I might mention here that I had an absolutely shit morning beforehand, so by the time I got to the studio to teach, I was so ready for a solid hour of exercise to get my head out of the rut it was in.  When I pulled into the parking lot at 9:23 (class was to start at 9:30), it was empty.  Not a great sign but I've seen it happen where some people come in right as class starts.  So I thought, whatever, and walked in.

When I went in, the lady behind the desk (the studio manager) said, "oh you ARE subbing!" as though she were happy about that, which made me happy too.  Then she went on to say, "I've had five people call this morning to ask who is teaching."  She then went on to say that when they found out it was a sub, they said they weren't coming.  I don't take that personally because nobody knew it was me until just then, but I am often the one who subs for her so that kind of sucked.  I don't even know why the manager told me that!  I don't need to know that!

So I went into the Zumba room and I was sitting down on a bench, putting my shoes on as DJ Dale Play was on the stereo system.. and this lady walks in.  She came to the edge of the hallway, saw that it was me, turned around and WALKED OUT.  There was no one else in the room and it was 9:32.  I started bawling.  I was so mad at that moment.  I was thinking, why am I even here?  Nobody wants to come to my class.  In the end, 4 people came.  Since we get per person, 50% of what they pay to get in, a class of 4 people earned me $12.  That is horrible.  I spent more on gas to get there than I earned in that class.

But that's just it - this isn't unusual.  I teach regularly at that studio on Monday mornings and I've been doing so since LAST July... and I'm still lucky to get 6 or 7 people and that's on a damn good day.  My classes have never ever grown there.  People say they like me, I do have regulars (whom I love), people tell me "oh yeah I'll start coming to your class" but they never do.  On the rare occasion that someone actually does give me a chance as a sub, they find out that my class is actually pretty fun and say they'll come check out my regular class, but then never come.  Why??  Why would you take the time to say that to me if you don't mean it?? Just say nothing!  Thank me for the class and LEAVE!  Don't make empty promises to appease me.  And if you have a problem with me or my class, tell me so!  How am I supposed to fix a problem unless I know there is one?  

And for the love of god, don't come in, see me, and leave.  That is just unbelievably rude and will hurt even the most confident instructor's feelings.  

Today I tried to buy a onesie for my little girl who isn't born yet, and get cash back so I could go to Starbucks.  My card was declined.  I checked my balance and had $16 to my name.  Not even enough for a tank of gas.  (I bought the onesie anyway.)  I was supposed to get all my jobs back after the first trimester but my ex-boss (different gym) decided to go back on her fucking word and not give me ANY of my classes back.  I taught 3 classes per week at that gym!!! That was my main source of income, since the studio from this morning doesn't pay me shit and I only work at one other gym once per week.  At this gym where I taught 3x/week, I was making $27/class, no matter how many people came in!  That's $81 per week, about $325 per month!!  Plus my other two jobs made it around $425-450 per month.  Now, all of a sudden with medical bills and an upcoming baby, she takes away a huge chunk of that income.  I can't find words to express how angry I am about that.  I've since quit that gym.

So I deposited another paycheck today (from the same studio as this morning) and now I have $58.  Awesome.  And a $300 monthly payment to my insurance to make that I certainly can't afford.  What the hell am I doing?  Clearly Zumba is not going to help me here.  Maybe I need to find a new job.