Thursday, May 14, 2015
Photobooth
On Mother's Day, when we went to the zoo, my mom and I decided to go into a photobooth! Here is the result:
Tuesday, May 12, 2015
Mother's Day 2015
Well... this was my first ACTUAL Mother's Day. I mean, that pertained to me. Last year was questionable, although I believe that you are a mother as soon as you put your child first, regardless of whether or not that child is born yet. But that's just my opinion. This year was unmistakeable - I'm a mom!
We started off the day leisurely at home. Mara woke up, I brought her into the bedroom and the three of us hung out for a little bit before we went downstairs. I pumped and Corky gave Mara a bottle. Then I went to my parents' house to give my mom her gift while Corky got Mara dressed and tended to the bulldogs.
My parents, my sister and I met Corky and Mara at a coffee place near their house. There we got breakfast and coffee. I took a few picture of my mom and my sister with Mara.
Then we went to the zoo. Unfortunately I don't have any pictures from that. My mom took several on her camera so hopefully she'll email me them soon and I can put them up.
After the zoo, Corky, Mara and I went to his mom's house to give her the gift we had for her. It was a flower pot with Mara's footprints on the side in the design of a butterfly. I bought a purple plant and we set it inside. It was cute. They gave me a bunch of stuff to make Mara homemade baby food. Corky got me a random smattering of gifts: a water bottle, a phone case and an iTunes gift card. Since Mara is too little to make me gifts, I guess I get the real deal in the meantime. I didn't ask for anything, I just wanted experiences. But I appreciate the thought!
After hanging out there for a while, we went to dinner at Black Bear Diner. I got fruit and an English muffin. Then we went home, gave Mara a bath, played with her, put her to bed and went to bed early. It was perfect!
Thursday, May 7, 2015
Thoughts on Being a Dairy Dispenser
I would have made the title of this post "Thoughts on Being a Dairy Cow" but I'm sure people would've interpreted that the wrong way, this being primarily an eating disorder blog and all. In reality, if I had indeed said that, the "cow" part would've been incidental. I guess I could say "dairy goat" because people drink goat's milk. The word dairy just means it's from the milk of a mammal. I'm a mammal. I make milk. So that's dairy. Dairy cows are just what we are most familiar with. And besides all of that, if I did say I was a dairy cow that would actually be fine since a lot of times dairy cows have bony hips. So there.
Anyway! Moving on. Mara is almost 5 1/2 months old now. Tomorrow she'll be exactly 5 1/2 months. Her main source of food is: Me. She does eat some solids but mainly she eats breast milk. I actually wouldn't have her eating solids as much as she is except for the fact that she's HUGE for her age and is so hungry that milk alone just doesn't cut it anymore. I mean, seriously, the kid is tall. I haven't measured her because she's also incredibly squirmy and it would be difficult to get an accurate measurement of her, but her next pediatrician appointment is May 28th and I'm sure they'll find she's grown since her last one back in March.
It's clear to me that my milk is of at least decent, if not high, quality. I'm hesitant to say it's of high quality because that feels like bragging, but let's look at the evidence (i.e. Mara and her growth). And what's wrong with bragging about that a little bit? I work hard for every ounce I produce! I put healthy food into my body, drink water, and minimize the amount of fake crap I eat/drink. I have drastically cut back my artificial sweetener consumption. Not cut it out completely, but definitely reduced it by a lot. Instead of drinking diet soda, I'll drink La Croix which has no sweeteners, no sodium and no calories. I do have splenda in my coffee occasionally but I try to go with real Stevia whenever possible. There is sucralose in my yogurt but that's pretty much the only thing with that in it that I eat anymore. I take my vitamins every day. I take fenugreek pills. I pump regularly to keep my supply up. Those things all take work and I do them on a daily basis. I think I've earned the right to say, "My milk is of high quality," don't you think?
Here's another fact, and it might surprise you: I actually really love nursing. Pumping I don't love so much, except when I'm really overdue for it and feeling desperate (then the sound of the pump is music to my ears) but I really love the act of nursing. I love seeing Mara root around for it, find it, latch on, and her little body relaxes in my arms. She makes the cutest faces while nursing. And her little hand goes wandering all over the place - touching my face, tapping my sternum, opening and closing her fist around the strap of my nursing tank, tangling in my hair, or even grabbing my lip or nose. She went through a phase where her nervous system was developing and she'd whack me with that hand, repeatedly, but now it's more gentle in it's exploration. She often falls asleep nursing.
I also love comfort nursing. When she bumps her head or doesn't feel good, she grabs at my shirt, pulling it down, asking to nurse. I love that when she needs comfort, she knows Mommy will provide it. I don't love it so much when she pulls my shirt down in public (which has happened a few times) but what can you do? Lol. Lately, in her sleep regression, the only way to get her to sleep has been to nurse her to sleep laying down. That is possibly the cutest thing ever. Her little body curls up against mine and I see her nurse like crazy and then slowly... slowly... slow down and slowly.. slowly.. slowly... close... her..... eyes... and she's out. Cutest. Thing. Ever.
It's going to be a sad day when I no longer can nurse her. I'm sure the hormones will be a kick. But mostly I'll miss that connection. But I know it'll be okay. There are other ways to connect with her. It just makes me sad to imagine a day when she'll be big enough, grown up enough, not to need me like that anymore. But that day is not today. So for today, and all the following today's before that day, I'll just nurse her. And I'll enjoy every minute of it. :)
Anyway! Moving on. Mara is almost 5 1/2 months old now. Tomorrow she'll be exactly 5 1/2 months. Her main source of food is: Me. She does eat some solids but mainly she eats breast milk. I actually wouldn't have her eating solids as much as she is except for the fact that she's HUGE for her age and is so hungry that milk alone just doesn't cut it anymore. I mean, seriously, the kid is tall. I haven't measured her because she's also incredibly squirmy and it would be difficult to get an accurate measurement of her, but her next pediatrician appointment is May 28th and I'm sure they'll find she's grown since her last one back in March.
It's clear to me that my milk is of at least decent, if not high, quality. I'm hesitant to say it's of high quality because that feels like bragging, but let's look at the evidence (i.e. Mara and her growth). And what's wrong with bragging about that a little bit? I work hard for every ounce I produce! I put healthy food into my body, drink water, and minimize the amount of fake crap I eat/drink. I have drastically cut back my artificial sweetener consumption. Not cut it out completely, but definitely reduced it by a lot. Instead of drinking diet soda, I'll drink La Croix which has no sweeteners, no sodium and no calories. I do have splenda in my coffee occasionally but I try to go with real Stevia whenever possible. There is sucralose in my yogurt but that's pretty much the only thing with that in it that I eat anymore. I take my vitamins every day. I take fenugreek pills. I pump regularly to keep my supply up. Those things all take work and I do them on a daily basis. I think I've earned the right to say, "My milk is of high quality," don't you think?
Here's another fact, and it might surprise you: I actually really love nursing. Pumping I don't love so much, except when I'm really overdue for it and feeling desperate (then the sound of the pump is music to my ears) but I really love the act of nursing. I love seeing Mara root around for it, find it, latch on, and her little body relaxes in my arms. She makes the cutest faces while nursing. And her little hand goes wandering all over the place - touching my face, tapping my sternum, opening and closing her fist around the strap of my nursing tank, tangling in my hair, or even grabbing my lip or nose. She went through a phase where her nervous system was developing and she'd whack me with that hand, repeatedly, but now it's more gentle in it's exploration. She often falls asleep nursing.
I also love comfort nursing. When she bumps her head or doesn't feel good, she grabs at my shirt, pulling it down, asking to nurse. I love that when she needs comfort, she knows Mommy will provide it. I don't love it so much when she pulls my shirt down in public (which has happened a few times) but what can you do? Lol. Lately, in her sleep regression, the only way to get her to sleep has been to nurse her to sleep laying down. That is possibly the cutest thing ever. Her little body curls up against mine and I see her nurse like crazy and then slowly... slowly... slow down and slowly.. slowly.. slowly... close... her..... eyes... and she's out. Cutest. Thing. Ever.
It's going to be a sad day when I no longer can nurse her. I'm sure the hormones will be a kick. But mostly I'll miss that connection. But I know it'll be okay. There are other ways to connect with her. It just makes me sad to imagine a day when she'll be big enough, grown up enough, not to need me like that anymore. But that day is not today. So for today, and all the following today's before that day, I'll just nurse her. And I'll enjoy every minute of it. :)
Wednesday, May 6, 2015
Mara pictures
Just because I'm so smitten with my baby girl.... Sorry if these are repeats any of them. I can't remember which ones I've done already! Lol
My 5 month old is wearing size 12-18 month pajamas in this pic.
Looking like her daddy.... EXACTLY like her daddy!
Mara and my parents
"Mommy I want your phone!" -Mara
Mara and her buddy Lennon had a date at the park :)
Hanging out on the bed with daddy
Part of Mara's lunch
Concentrating on her seahorse toy.
Saturday, May 2, 2015
Food as Art
Tonight I was trying to hard boil some eggs and boil and purée some carrots, and needed to keep Mara occupied and happy while I was at the stove. I plopped her in her high chair and gave her some spoons to play with.
However, she kept flinging them onto the floor.
The escapee plasticware
So I decided to give her something a little more interesting to play with..... prunes!
She did some fruity fingerprinting and painted her high chair brown.
"Do you like it Mommy? I call it, Ode to a Shriveled Fruit That Has Been Puréed!"
Thursday, April 30, 2015
BEDA (Day 30) - Welcome to Mommyville
We made it!! Last day of BEDA! This also means that it's likely that our facebook newsfeeds will be blown up with that meme of Justin Timberlake with the words "It's Gonna Be May" which was funny, maybe, the first fifty times you saw it but by now you're just like OMG staaaaaaaaaaaahhhhppppp!!!
Okay. Moving on. THANK YOU all who commented on yesterday's BEDA "Roll Call"! I've always been so curious as to who actually reads this thing and got that idea from Ruby over on And Then She Recovered (hi Ruby! Since I know you read this) and decided to give it a try. So cool to hear from all of you! Now, open a new browser window and go check out Ruby's blog but make sure you come back to mine! She's rad. ;)
I've got to admit... when some of you said I was inspirational or such, I was a little surprised. I don't feel like I'm doing much of anything special over here. Most of the time I feel pretty scattered and like I'm running away from a tsunami, hanging on by my fingertips. Sometimes I feel like a hypocrite. Other times I don't have a clue what I'm doing (okay, most times I feel that way!) but I'm glad I can be of some kind of help to some of you! That makes it definitely worth it.
So... speaking of the little stinkbug.... Hello Sleep Regression! UGH! Can I just have an IV drip of coffee puh-LEASE! Better yet, just the caffeine part! Right in my vein, thanks. She has been waking up several times per night, and with my having to get up early for teaching classes not to mention pumping in the middle of the night or very early before I leave, I haven't slept more than about 3 hours per night in a week.
Last night, however, was the worst. Mara went down for bed like normal at 8, but woke up at 10:30 wanting a bottle, which Corky fed her. Then she woke up at midnight, 1:10am, 2:30 and 3:15! I never got to sleep at all because just as I would drift off, she'd cry. Finally at 3:15am I went in there, scooped her out of bed, sat in the rocking chair and rocked her to sleep. There I stayed until about 4:30 when my butt was so asleep I couldn't take it anymore. Then I spread a blanket out on the floor, laid Mara down, nursed her until she fell asleep and I laid beside her. I was freezing my ass off but I couldn't move because she had the strap of my nursing tank in her fist and I didn't dare move. My alarm was set for 6:00am, so at 5:45 I went and got Corky.
I have to teach Zumba at 8:30am so here I sit, being a dairy cow (pumping) because I have to leave at 7:30 on account of the commute to Tualatin being horrendous. I doubt very much I'll remember any of my choreography! LOL!!!! Oh such a glamorous life I live.
But you know what? I love it. I wouldn't trade it for anything!!! Yes I'm more exhausted than I've ever been before, but I knew this was coming. Everyone warned me that the first year of her life would be the most exhausting, toughest year of my life. They were right, of course, but it's also going to be a GREAT year. Mara is growing, learning and changing every day - right before my eyes! I'm incredibly proud of her. The love is so deep, it's unimaginable if you've never experienced it.
This is what mornings look like around here. The quiet before the rest of the house wakes up..... a creature comes lumbering down the stairs into the kitchen... it's a strange looking beast. Hair sticking up at odd angles. Strange black circles around its' eyes. A weird, jerky way of walking. Usually seen clutching a coffee cup. What ever could this monster be? Bigfoot? Baba Yaga? No... in its' native habitat it's a..... ZOMBIE MOM!!!!
Okay. Moving on. THANK YOU all who commented on yesterday's BEDA "Roll Call"! I've always been so curious as to who actually reads this thing and got that idea from Ruby over on And Then She Recovered (hi Ruby! Since I know you read this) and decided to give it a try. So cool to hear from all of you! Now, open a new browser window and go check out Ruby's blog but make sure you come back to mine! She's rad. ;)
I've got to admit... when some of you said I was inspirational or such, I was a little surprised. I don't feel like I'm doing much of anything special over here. Most of the time I feel pretty scattered and like I'm running away from a tsunami, hanging on by my fingertips. Sometimes I feel like a hypocrite. Other times I don't have a clue what I'm doing (okay, most times I feel that way!) but I'm glad I can be of some kind of help to some of you! That makes it definitely worth it.
So... speaking of the little stinkbug.... Hello Sleep Regression! UGH! Can I just have an IV drip of coffee puh-LEASE! Better yet, just the caffeine part! Right in my vein, thanks. She has been waking up several times per night, and with my having to get up early for teaching classes not to mention pumping in the middle of the night or very early before I leave, I haven't slept more than about 3 hours per night in a week.
Last night, however, was the worst. Mara went down for bed like normal at 8, but woke up at 10:30 wanting a bottle, which Corky fed her. Then she woke up at midnight, 1:10am, 2:30 and 3:15! I never got to sleep at all because just as I would drift off, she'd cry. Finally at 3:15am I went in there, scooped her out of bed, sat in the rocking chair and rocked her to sleep. There I stayed until about 4:30 when my butt was so asleep I couldn't take it anymore. Then I spread a blanket out on the floor, laid Mara down, nursed her until she fell asleep and I laid beside her. I was freezing my ass off but I couldn't move because she had the strap of my nursing tank in her fist and I didn't dare move. My alarm was set for 6:00am, so at 5:45 I went and got Corky.
I have to teach Zumba at 8:30am so here I sit, being a dairy cow (pumping) because I have to leave at 7:30 on account of the commute to Tualatin being horrendous. I doubt very much I'll remember any of my choreography! LOL!!!! Oh such a glamorous life I live.
But you know what? I love it. I wouldn't trade it for anything!!! Yes I'm more exhausted than I've ever been before, but I knew this was coming. Everyone warned me that the first year of her life would be the most exhausting, toughest year of my life. They were right, of course, but it's also going to be a GREAT year. Mara is growing, learning and changing every day - right before my eyes! I'm incredibly proud of her. The love is so deep, it's unimaginable if you've never experienced it.
This is what mornings look like around here. The quiet before the rest of the house wakes up..... a creature comes lumbering down the stairs into the kitchen... it's a strange looking beast. Hair sticking up at odd angles. Strange black circles around its' eyes. A weird, jerky way of walking. Usually seen clutching a coffee cup. What ever could this monster be? Bigfoot? Baba Yaga? No... in its' native habitat it's a..... ZOMBIE MOM!!!!
Wednesday, April 29, 2015
BEDA (Day 29) - Roll Call
Good morning Blogisphere. Anyone out there?
I want to get to know you!
Leave me a comment! Please? Even just saying your name (if it doesn't say it automatically when you comment) and where you're from. Or tell me how you came across my blog. Or what your favorite color is. Or anything!!!
Love love love.
Happy Wednesday!!!
I want to get to know you!
Leave me a comment! Please? Even just saying your name (if it doesn't say it automatically when you comment) and where you're from. Or tell me how you came across my blog. Or what your favorite color is. Or anything!!!
Love love love.
Happy Wednesday!!!
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