This post is difficult to write. The reason being that I keep crying and I can't see the keyboard (thank goodness for all the typing classes in middle school eh?)
I believe I've mentioned in a previous post that I started personal training with my boss at one of my gyms. She teaches Zumba and has been a personal trainer for a long time. She kicks my butt!
Today she gave me the diet plan she's been working on for me. I do not like it.
I have a friend that has been training with her for a few months now. She looks great! But I also watched her struggle with her diet plan, just because it is very repetitive and a lot of protein shakes and meat. Those of you who have known me a while know that I am not great with meat. I'm not vegetarian, I just don't really like it much.
This is how my daily meal plan looks:
Meal 1: Protein smoothie 1 scoop (with frozen berries and a little almond milk and water)
Meal 2: Protein 1 scoop with water
Meal 3: 4 oz chicken in pita bread OR 4 oz turkey on Dave's Killer Bread
Meal 4: Protein 1 scoop with water
Meal 5: Green salad with 4 oz chicken breast, calorie-free dressing.
I have to do this for 4-5 days, and then I get 2 days off.
Considering I have chronic anorexia, my "cheat days" would probably consist of things like oatmeal and apples! Yes that's right.. I can't have any fruit except the berries in my smoothie in the morning. I'm also only allowed to have green, leafy vegetables. No carrots. No tomatoes. No cucumber. I can't have sweet potatoes. I can't have rice cakes. I can't have Greek yogurt.
So why am I crying? Because I already feel so restricted in my food choices because of my eating disorder. I don't want to limit myself any more than I already do. If she tells me "you can't have oatmeal" then I'll never eat it again! It'll just make me even more fearful. I don't know what to do. Is this a bad idea?
***Update: I tallied up the calories in the meal plan and it ranges from 798-813. I understand that the protein energy should make up for the lack of calories, but that's only if I were able to consume that much protein. If I miss one protein shake, that will drop the daily calories to 683-698. If I miss two, that will drop it to 568-573 if I don't supplement it with anything else. HMM!!!!***
Honey, not just because of the ED, but just in general, I don't think this is a good idea. That restrictive of a diet is not healthy. We need a wide variety of fruits and veggies to get the vitamins and antioxidants and minerals we need. Also, this could (and seems to be) really messing with you psychologically. This lady is NOT a dietitian and I really encourage you to reconsider.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying to, except now my ED brain has got ahold of this. Now I've stepped out of the Diet Plan and I feel so guilty I can hardly stand it! Just got to get my brain around it I guess. XO! Your comments are always so sweet. Thank you thank you thank you <3 <3 <3
DeleteI don't think it's a good idea to limit any of your foods, especially since there should be no "good" or "bad" foods. And I totally get what you mean about taking away safe foods. My dietitian won't take mine out bc she knows how much it effects me psychologically but she just works on adding in more protein and such with what I will eat. And I'm just like you. I'm not a vegetarian, but I don't really eat meat. An occasional steak or something but that's it. I think it would be best to just try to add a protein smoothie to what you already will eat (oatmeal and apples) and then go from there. Cutting things back out seems counterproductive. And the calories...she expects you to eat not even 1000 calories and be weight and cardio training...and teach zumba all day?!?! Does she know you have an eating disorder? I think overall it is a bad idea. :( Take care of yourself plz! <3
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