Hawaii in T-Minus 17 Days

So we're FINALLY going to go on vacation.  My parents want to take one last vacation this summer before school starts up for my sister and work picks back up for my dad, so they invited Corky and me (and Mara of course, because she currently goes everywhere I go.)

And ALL  I have to say is I CANNOT GO TO HAWAII if I do not start eating more veggies and protein and less carbs.  No, I have not gained tons of weight.  But I feel as though I have.  And I eat so much carbs and stuff... I just need it for the energy.  I literally can't teach Zumba if I don't eat something with carbohydrates in it because they give me the quick energy I need to teach a class.  

Now, I feel the need to mention that I have not even once eaten fast food while I've been pregnant.  I have not eaten horrible craving foods.  I haven't even had horrible cravings! My idea of eating horribly is having an extra bowl of cereal or a spoonful or 2 of ice cream.  Do I know how ridiculous I sound half the time?  Of course I do.  But this is a real thing.  I feel guilty every time I eat anything.

Everyone keeps telling me "You're tiny!" "You're all baby!" "You look like you're hiding a basketball under your shirt and that's all."  They also say, "You're so lucky--I got big EVERYWHERE."  "Where is this baby going to go? You have nowhere to put her!"  So I guess that makes me feel better.  And people often seem surprised that I'm still teaching Zumba.  But that doesn't really take away from the fact that this whole thing is just so fucking HARD.

At the same time as feeling guilty for eating, I feel guilty for having a hard time.  I understand I am having an easy pregnancy.  I understand that I could have it much, much worse.  Why does that have to be everyone's favorite thing to point out when I do try to mention how difficult it is?  Talk about invalidation!  Pregnancy isn't easy no matter what it is you're facing.  Just because I appear to be handling it well doesn't mean I always am.

Anyway.  Hawaii in 17 days.  I am excited for it.  Just hope I don't repulse anyone (especially myself) when wearing my bikini.  Yes, I am 6 months pregnant and wear a bikini.  Deal with it. :)