Yesterday I went to my Naturopath. Alena's brother came with me because he has decided to go to school to be an ND, and he wanted to "watch one in action." It was kind of cool having him there.
Anyway, every time I go see my ND, she weighs me. It's a blind weight so I never know what the scale says. But yesterday she said to me, "Given the fact that your wedding is so close and you have stress about the dress fitting, do you want to know what trend your weight is taking?"
I almost said yes. But then I thought, what if she says it's higher? I'd be fucked in the head for days! So I said no. But then she said, "Okay, well... I recommend you try on the dress this weekend." I must have had an awful look on my face because she said, "You want to make sure it's not too small OR too big!"
But she could not recover that one.
Now I am absolutely terrified. I'm SO SURE that I've gained weight. I can't even deal with it. I have 10 days to make sure that dress fits.
Can't I just elope?
In the words of a blogger I follow, "stop the world, I want to get off!"
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